How 'Bout D'em Cowboys (And That Business Culture)

Remember how I promised that I would post in the color blue one time only? Well, I lied. Since posting in Giants-blue brought the New York Giants good luck last week, I've decided to do it again in advance of their game against the Dallas Cowboys this Sunday.

I should probably hate the Dallas Cowboys as much as I do the Giants' other rivals in the NFC East, the Philadelphia Eagles and the Washington Redskins. Except I don't. I really like Terrell Owens and Tony Romo. And, of course, I just adore Jessica Simpson, Tony Romo's girlfriend (her "I Think I'm In Love" video which you can check out at www.youtube.com/watch?v=YHMpaZ90ptQ&feature=related is a true classic).

I've only been to Dallas once. In July 2001, I was part of the team advising one of the world's largest integrated oil companies in connection with its friendly, $2.9 billion tender offer for another integrated oil company headquartered in Dallas. We flew from Teterboro, NJ to Dallas on board one of our client's Gulfstream IV corporate jets--a truly AWESOME experience in every respect. We were met on the tarmac by a fleet of three cars and three drivers, each driver wearing black pants, a short-sleeved white dress shirt, a skinny black tie and Blues Brothers-style sunglasses. I thought their dress shirts particularly odd. Short sleeves?

When we arrived at the offices of the lawyers for the target company, I was surprised to see that they were wearing suits with short-sleeved dress shirts as well. I quickly figured out that business people in Dallas dress a little differently in July than those of us from New York. I also noticed some non-sartorial distinctions as well. The lawyers from Dallas were tough but fair-minded. There was none of the shrill, whiner, weasel-outbursts done for dramatic effect that I often encountered in New York. Over the course of the next few days, I became really good friends with the Dallas lawyers. I got a particular kick out of the stuffed deer heads mounted on the walls of their offices--trophies from the hunting trips that they had been on. My Upper West Side living, espresso drinking, Hillary Clinton-voting friends back in New York would have died! I loved it.

My experience in Dallas was a good reminder of how vast the United States really is, not just in terms of geography, but also in terms of business culture. I've worked with people from all over the United States and, in future posts, I plan to explore the regional business culture distinctions that I've encountered.

Getting back to the game on Sunday, I hope that the Cowboys totally implode. I won't feel too bad for Tony Romo, though--maybe he'll get some extra consolation lovin' from Jessica Simpson!

John McCain's Canadian Connection

In light of John McCain's victory yesterday in New Hampshire, I decided to visit his campaign website and glean what I could about his views on Canada. To my surprise, I discovered that Sidney McCain, Senator McCain's eldest daughter, lives in Toronto!

According to the profile (which can be found at www.johnmccain.com//About/McCainChildren.htm), Sidney is in the music business and recently served as the General Manager of V2 Records, Canada. Apparently, she loves baseball and makes an annual trip south to the training camps of the New York Yankees and the Toronto Blue Jays.

Out of curiosity, I plugged Sidney McCain's name into my favorite search engine. I found a very interesting article about her in the February 2006 issue of Toronto Life recounting her search for a place to live with her boyfriend (check it out at www.torontolife.com/features/the-new-starter-home/?pageno=4). I found the article interesting on a couple of counts. First, there's no mention of Sidney's famous father. Second, a picture of Sidney is included. Here it is:

Wow, Sidney totally looks like her dad! And, wow, her boyfriend totally looks like a dough-boy loser! Can you picture THAT guy at official dinners at the White House? Disturbing.

College Football? Canada Sacked For A Major Loss!

Tonight, the Ohio State Buckeyes face the LSU Tigers in the BCS National Championship Game to determine U.S. college football supremacy.

Until I moved to the United States, I really didn't appreciate how big college football actually is down here. I mean I knew it was big, I just didn't realize it was THIS BIG! My wife went to the University of Notre Dame and is absolutely rabid about her Fighting Irish. She's taken me to two games at Notre Dame (one of which was the 2005 game against USC featuring the famous last minute heroics of Matt Leinert and Reggie Bush) and both times I've been astounded by how totally into it everyone is. Virtually the entire study body shows up and sits together with the remaining 80,000 seats filled by alumni who will scratch, kick, punch and bite to get tickets.

This is in complete and utter contradistinction to my experiences at both the University of Toronto and McGill University. I walked by Varsity Stadium every day to and from law school but never made it to a single Varsity Blues game. I went to a grand total of one game at McGill. And then I went only to placate the button cute, strawberry-blonde freshman from New Brunswick that I was dating. My girlfriend and I were part of a crowd of two hundred or so fellow McGill students. I think the opposing team was the Queen's Golden Gaels although I could be wrong about that. My girlfriend got cold and we left at half time.

I'll leave it to somebody with a Ph.D. in Psychology, Sociology, Anthropology or one of those other "ology" type disciplines to explain why U.S. college football is hot and Canadian university football is not. My own personal theory is that it might have something to do with the cheerleaders. Here's a photo of a recent USC cheerleading squad:

Wow! Aren't these girls something special? Now let's just compare the hotties from USC with a recent cheerleading team from the University of Toronto:

It's hard to make anybody out because the photo is so bad. I think there might be a cute girl or two off to the right. Unfortunately, the view of the girls is obstructed by ALL OF THE DUDES! What in God's name is going on here? Call me old school, but real men have no place on a cheerleading squad. Hot female cheerleaders will draw hoards of guys who will, in turn, attract women looking to meet or hang out with said guys. Next thing you know, your stadium is packed and your football team is relevant!

Just an observation from the Star-Spangled Canuck.

"The President of Canada"

I was going to refrain from talking about the U.S. presidential race until after the primaries in New Hampshire. However, the magnitude of Barack Obama's victory in Iowa has prompted me to consider the topic a bit earlier.

A lot of my Canadian friends were outraged when, in a debate last August, Senator Obama said that, if elected President, he would call, "The President of Canada" to discuss NAFTA (if you haven't already seen it, check it out here: www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZjU2CBEIfh4&feature=related). Should Canadians be worried that a front-runner for President of the United States doesn't know that Canada has a prime minister and not a president? I don't think so.

The United States has been treading water for years now. According to a number of recent polls, a vast majority of Americans think that the country is "on the wrong path." I'm with those folks. The economy just doesn't seem right (I'm sure that the U.S. is in a recession now and predict that it will last through Q3 of 2008), the stock markets have underperformed those of other countries for several years running and the nation re-building exercise in Iraq and the ongoing conflict in Afghanistan are taking longer than anyone reasonably expected. Things just seem out of sorts.

I know that a lot of Canadians look upon the current situation in the U.S. with smug derision and a healthy dose of schadenfreude. My advice? Knock it off. I've heard the argument that the Canadian economy has "de-coupled" from the U.S. economy. For reasons that I can get into later, I'm not buying any of it. If the U.S. economy crashes and burns, Canada's economy is going down with it. Canadians should be rooting for the presidential candidate most likely to reinvigorate the U.S. and lead it out of its current funk. Even if that candidate needs a lesson in Canadian civics.

(p.s. In the interests of full disclosure, I should mention that I like Barack Obama. A lot. I'm also a big supporter of Mitt Romney. Clearly the two best candidates in my view.)

NFL vs. CFL? No Need To Choose.

I'm a huge fan of the New York Giants and am counting down the seconds until their first round playoff game against Tampa Bay on Sunday. In honor of the Giants, this one time only, I'm writing in blue. The colors of this post should now match the red, gray and blue of the Giants' uniforms. Go Giants!

All the hoopla surrounding the first round of the NFL playoffs has got me thinking about the whole NFL vs. CFL debate. It seems to me that it's becoming increasingly fashionable for Canadians (especially Central Canadians, especially Torontonians--you know who you are) to dump all over the CFL. Knock it off! The CFL and the Grey Cup are longstanding Canadian institutions that should be embraced. Sometimes I think Americans look more favorably on the CFL than Canadians do. Even the most casual NFL fan down here knows that guys like Joe Theisman, Warren Moon and Doug Flutie got their big breaks in the CFL.

Actually, there's one more name that can be added to the list: Jeff Garcia, the quarterback slated to start for Tampa Bay on Sunday! As someone who thinks that the CFL deserves a lot more respect, I hope Jeff Garcia has a great game on Sunday. That having been said, I hope his teammates all have the worst game of their lives and get trounced, thrashed and totally owned by the Giants!

Let's go Giants!!!!!! All the way, baby!!!!!!

Toupee Or Not Toupee? That Is The Question.

One common beef I hear from Canadians is, "Americans are totally ignorant about our country. We're their biggest trading partner and they don't know anything about us. Blah, blah, blah, whine, whine, whine, boo, hoo, hoo."

Well, my northern-dwelling friends, the truth is it's darned tough to stay apprised of the goings on in Canada when you don't live there. When I moved to New York in December 1997, I wanted to subscribe to The Globe & Mail. To my great surprise, The Globe & Mail wasn't home-delivered in New York and, in fact, was available only at a very limited number of newsstands on a one-day delay basis. To my great annoyance, the papers sold out very quickly. I soon gave up trying to keep abreast of Canadian affairs.

Of course, the Internet soon came to my rescue. I now check the on-line version of The Globe & Mail every day. It's a less than perfect way to stay informed, though. I find the coverage sort of "hit-or-miss" and while I have a pretty good grasp on what's going on from 30,000 feet (that's 10,936 meters for you "metric only" types), I'm at a complete loss when it comes to more piffling things like trying to name any premier of any Maritime province. Detailed questions like that just beat the hell out of me.

If you think I'm kidding, go to the on-line version of The Globe & Mail yourself, pretend you're not from Canada and see how hard it is to figure out exactly who, where and what is going on. It doesn't help that some of the good stuff has an electronic padlock next to it. I'm thinking of Jeffrey Simpson's column in particular. On the topic of Jeffrey Simpson, what in God's name is going on there? He looks terrible! Here's his photo from the on-line version of The Globe & Mail:

Is that a toupee or should Jeffrey no longer be on speaking terms with his barber, stylist or whoever else it was that inflicted that nasty looking 'do on him?

In any event, the point I'm trying to make is that you all shouldn't be so tough on Americans for not knowing what's going on in Canada. It's tough, even for people like me who care about what's happening.